I have written about obscene or mutant fruit before, and oddly, the pineapple seems to have a lot of issues in the warped genes category. Thank goodness I am allergic to it. Heehee, actually I miss eating this delicious fruit. I spied this totally bizarre mutant pineapple on a drive back from the beach a few days ago. It totally represents the way I feel (imagine Marketman’s head represented with fruit) when I open up my website these days and find over 300 spam messages that litter the landscape in just say 8 short hours. I spend nearly half an hour clearing everything out and cursing the perpetrators to hopefully doom them to several lifetimes as cockroaches in hell. I even seriously considered stopping all comments period but that would ruin this site and eventually mean I would have to stop the blog… May ten thousand pins laced with tuba vinegar be pierced into your rears, silly spammers. You have truly ruined the name of a noble and wonderful canned concoction of pork shoulder and ham… I would like to shove a thick sugar cane from Negros up where the sun doesn’t shine… slather you with molave honey and tie you to the tamarind tree in our backyard that is ground zero for the most humongous red ants… and finally, grease your fingertips with french butter before forcibly searing them on my finest copper fish pan (so we can do both hands simultaneously) that has been left on high heat for 30 minutes prior to the sizzle that will hopefully cure you from the bad habit of sending out all this blasted garbage. Oh, and I forgot, I would also force feed you 500 cans of spam and nothing else until you signed an apology to all those you have annoyed!