They say that if you do something for 10,000 or more hours, you can truly become an expert in that endeavor. I suspect de-boning a bangus can be perfected in about 1-2,000 hours, but I have no desire to prove that suspicion. In the past 45 years, I have probably consumed several hundred boneless bangus but I have NEVER de-boned a bangus, and haven’t the foggiest idea how to do it competently. When I was younger, we sometimes ate fried bangus with the bones, and it was like bobbing for fish meat between hundreds of bones, not a pleasant memory at all. The last time I was in Bacolod, I spied this guy at the market making short shrift of deboning bangus, and I was mesmerized…

He could totally debone a medium sized bangus in less than 90 seconds! The main fish bone (spine?) was quickly despatched, and with a scissor/tweezer like implement, he quickly went down the sides of the butterflied fish and pulled out the little bones in rapid fire surgical movements. He would even be chatting with the fish vendor next door while working on a fish. I was so shocked to see how fast he was doing this that I stood there for several minutes while he de-boned a half dozen fish… it was amazing. I wish there were a Guiness Book of World Record for fishmongers who could debone fish in a few seconds… :)

There are some things I know that I will never do well. Or have no real burning desire to learn how to do well. So I am just happy that others are so good at it. With the de-boned bangus the next question is how best to enjoy it? And for me, that is daing na bangus, fried, served with lots of vinegar and chilies, a mini-mountain of rice and lots of homemade acharra. And yes, preferably cooked in a fish pan. :)

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This place is a hole in the wall. I wouldn’t even describe it as quaint or charming. But ignore the synthetic tables, chairs, bowls and highly bendable metallic utensils and order several fried boneless bangus — it is simply delicious and a bargain at P190 per fish at the last visit (last week). Also ignore what must be the country’s dourest and most listless wait staff that seem oblivious to a good thing the whole place has going. Full by 11:30 am on a weekend, the place is packed with a truly diverse clientele from Range Rover ferried hoity toities to brat pack motorcycle enthusiasts on a day trip to Tagaytay. LZM has opened more and more extensions to handle the crowds, but ever since I tried this place several years ago, I still go back to the old roadside location with tacky curtains, warm aircons and a fishtank with a humongous lone occupant staring out at you while you eat lunch. The best innovation I noticed at the last visit was the solution to an aircon leak… just train the water to a crack in the window using clear strapping tape…

The place has its fans, from prominent photos of President Fidel Ramos munching there after a golf game to other celebrities et al plastered on their walls. The reason –great bangus, sinampalukang manok and other home-cooked specialties that make you want to eat more and more. I am not sure what makes their bangus so good but they do start with brilliantly fat and succulent fish to begin with, apparently brought in from fishponds in Dagupan, Pangasinan. These are then breaded or coated in flour and plunged into pans filled with re-used lard or vegetable fat. Yum. Their sinampalukang manok is also quite good and at P160 an order that feeds 4 people it’s also a bargain. Pinakbet is P130 an order. Some of their other dishes are erratic at best and I would steer clear of their beefsteak tagalog at the moment as it was downright dissappointing the last time I ordered it. A feast (at least 8 different dishes) for a party of eight might run you P1700 with drinks.

LZM only takes cash and doesn’t add a service charge. I always tip heavily hoping they will remember me the next time I roll around and get better service but that strategy hasn’t worked at all. Nevertheless, the value for quality trade off here is very, very positive. Enjoy your bangus.

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