What the Doctor (and Secretary) Said…

Acute Bronchitis, possibly bordering on Pneumonia. That’s it. Nothing to worry about. A serious course of overpriced antibiotics, some cough medicine and lots of liquids and rest for 7 days… but blogging allowed (I am assuming the doctor knew what that meant, now that I think about it, he gave me this look that could have meant he understood it to be something else…). The last time I had this was about 7 years ago, but it was worse then. But I do have to rant about this particular doctor’s gatekeeper, secretary, assistant… she typifies a minority of folks in the country that I reserve an “automatic squeeze her/his neck akimbo stance” after dealing with them for just seconds.

First of all, I must say that most doctors, and I KNOW a lot of my readers are part of the medical profession, have less than totally logical and fair and efficient ways of booking appointments/consultations. Most will not give you a specific time to come see them if you need a consultation on short notice. Most will ask you to sign up, make pila on first come, first serve basis, etc. and in the end the patient wastes time, the doctor has a crowd, the hospital fills up with more germs, and the main reason given for this is that many people don’t show up at appointed times and therefor this bizarre procedure that WASTES an incredible amount of time… but that is my two cents worth… here was the actual exchange with this particular secretary (I try to replicate it as true to the real conversation, though I admit to slight exaggeration and embellishment):

Text to W (Secretary): How are appts. made with Dr. E? By phone? First Come, First Serve?
Text from W to MM: The earliest appt. you can have to see Dr. E is on Sept 28 (9 days later)…
MM calls W on her cellphone : “This is MM. I just texted you. Do you mean to tell me Dr E has no clinic hours where a dying sick person can seek a consultation? I have to wait until next week?”
W answers: “Yes, sir. Kasi taga embassy kayo, by appointment only. (Because you are an embassy person, you can only come by appointment).”
MM says: “Now, how the heck can you tell I am from an embassy from my text alone? And which embassy am I from?”
W answers: “Ay, hindi kayo embassy?” (Oh, you aren’t an embassy?)
MM says: “What are you talking about? I need a consultation with Dr. E for my lungs, I don’t need a bloody visa, for God’s sake. So how do I get an appointment for tomorrow, do I just go to your office and line up if I am dying???”
W says: “Yes, you line up. Office Hours from 4 to 6 pm. But the doctor is here from 4:30 only”
MM says: “Okay, so if I go at 3p.m., will that mean I will be among the first in line?”
W says: “Depende sa listahan.” (It depends on the list).
MM says: “What list, you said it was first come first serve and I have to line up.”
W says: “You have to sign up on a list that I put outside the office at 1 o’clock pa.”
MM says “@!%#@!!!!!, W, why the heck didn’t you say that from the beginning so that I know what your process is??? So if I go at 12:30, and there is no one in the hallway with me at your office door, I will be DEFINITELY number 1 for the 4:30 arrival of the doc?”
W says: “Ay maybe sir.”
MM says: “Okay, Miss W, I will be there at 12 noon and will swat away anyone else who tries to cut in front of me and IF I am not first on that list and no mysterious names crop up then I will be assured no long wait when the doctor arrives. And if you screw me, I won’t let you forget it.”
W texts 5 hours later: “Sino kayo, who are you, full name please.”
MM says: “Why?”
W texts: “Because I can just put you as #1 on the list for tomorrow’s appointments”

ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!! Some people should not ever be allowed to breed as they would certainly dilute the global gene pool.

As if that weren’t enough, upon arrival at 4:15 at the Doc’s office:

W says: “Yes? (With raised kilay pa (arched eyebrow, no less)”
MM says: “I am MM.”
W says: “Flease wait outside.”
W screams in Market-like tones: “MM, Flease pill in these porms.”
MM says: “I am a frevious fatient, have you looked for my pile?”
W says: “NO, you are not a fatient yet. Flease pill this in.”
MM says: “Are you sure? My name is MM. Did you look for my pile?”
W says: After searching for 3 minutes, “Ay, ya, you are fatient na fala…hahaha.”

Now tell me, would I go to jail if I hit the silly woman with my second pile polder and stuck my ballpen where the sun doesn’t shine???

If I weren’t peeling so sick, I would have funched her in the pace while screaming “if I paint, it’s because I am no longer a fatient fatient!!!”

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88 Responses

  1. Glad to hear nothing serious! Your doctor’s secretary’s text messages and phone exchanges with you are hilarious. They certainly make my day! Get plenty of rest and lots of fresh fruit juices and hot soup to regain your energy. Feel better soon.

  2. I sympathize with you, MM. There really are some doctors’ secretaries who try your patience. There are even some who arrive at the clinic much, much later than the doctors whom they are supposed to be assisting (or doing whatever it is they do). Although I must say most are efficient and are rather cheerful. It’s good to know that your affliction is something that can be easily treated by antibiotics but remember that the best medicine, aside from laughter :=), is rest, so you can do your blogging/posts while you rest, hehe..

  3. Now THAT was a funny post! I needed that laugh after a taxing day. Geepers, is that how “First come, First serve” policy play out over there?

    Don’t forget to take those antibiotics religiously for 10 days. No skipping ;)

  4. At least you’ve got diagnosed and hopefully given proper medications despite that hilarious conversation albeit stupid (your doc’s receptionist of course) exchanges. Either way, they should have much better system in making appointments. That’s what appointments are for.
    The only time I waited for an hour for my doctor is when her receptionist had to cancel my appointment in the morning because she had a jury duty. The receptionist had to squeeze me in the afternoon, which of course by then they already have a back-up of patients. If I say I want to be seen at 8:00 in the morning, I get seen at exactly that time. I come in, I sign in, I’m in and out, no wasted time and still get to work that day. In emergency cases, the most I’ve waited is about 45 minutes, again, no wasted time there, I still go on with my regular activities for the day.

    Anyhoo, get some rests and get well soon.

  5. Ha ha ha MM. Laughter is indeed the best medicine. Too bad you’re not laughing and I who am, I’m not sick. Feel better soon !

  6. This is pretty much the same reason why I don’t go to walk-ins whenever I get sick. Well, nowadays, the wait time could be from 1 hour and more. Even if I choose to book an appointment, they don’t have anything sooner, so might as well stay home and get some rest instead of going to the doctors…But if I’m really sick (or dying, hope not) then I’ll drive to the emergency, but then it’s the same situation, unless, you’re “nag-hihingalo”, then you’ll be their first priority, if not, you’re stuck for a few hours, goodluck!

    I would’ve done the same thing to the secretary MM! I’m definitely not in the mood to play the yes and no game with her! Oh I can only imagine how irritated you are, I hope that the folder is hard enough to knock her brains out! :)

  7. Ha…ha…ha…ha… Same us here… I will be going to see the doctor next week for my left arm and foot numbness. Get well soon!

  8. On the brighter side, you are well enough to get “bothered” by the incident :)

    True, rules are rules and as long as people do follow the system there should be less problems. And waiting in line shouldn’t be a class system.

    I would hate to go before anyone in line, and won’t tolerate if someone did too. I call their attention :)

    Relax and enjoy being a kid.

  9. This is soooooooo totally & tragically hilarious! It’s a great reminder and incentive never to be sick!!!

  10. I looove your scenarios! I don’t think I ever had a pleasant experience when it comes to waiting for the medical doctor. One time i even had to wait long in the emergency room! However, we have a very kind albularyo here and there are more times when he gets it more correct than the local hospitals hereabouts! I’m not kidding. And he doesn’t make anyone wait nor has a secretary. If a patient needs immediate attention, the others in line immediately allows that person to be the first to be treated.

  11. That is so funny !! I had the same happen to me at a US post office. I went there yesterday at 2 PM to apply for a new passport … only to be told that I have to get there early (like 8:30 AM) and get on a list. Also, they only take 30 applications a day. I get there at 8:30 AM this morning and was #4 on the list. The responsible person finally arrived at 9:30 AM. It took her an average of 25 minutes per person … when all she had to do was stamp your application form, check your identification/supporting documents and pictures, accept payment and, ask you to take an oath! And guess what … you have to wait 6-8 weeks to get your new passport!!

  12. HA HA HA HA….you made my day MM…with rains pouring cats and dogs outside, coming in office with wet shoes and pants…all miseries of getting wet is gone just by reading your post.

    Get well soon, I also encountered this kind of secretary everytime my son had his regular monthly check up…try going check up with an ob-gyne…when the secretary sees you’re near the due date…whether your listed at the end of the list, they will immediately let you in. You may never know you might give birth right there just by waiting for the doctor!

    Get well…..

  13. Sorry MM so funny i am cracking up and my 3 year old son is yelling at me “mom its not funny”, i can’t help it, hope you are okay now

  14. Yep, they can be pretty ridiculous, no? I gave up going to the hospital and being subject to their clinic hours (and you really have to wait for hours on end! which is ridiculous if you are running a fever and feeling miserable). I actually just go to the clinics in the mall (their doctors are pretty good) where I am assured they have specialists whenever I go.

    I hope you feel better soon though!

  15. Last August and September, I spent 6 weeks in Manila following up insurance claims, SSS claims and dealing with nitwits that populate private and public offices. Although your post was terribly amusing, it also made me very upset again and raised my blood pressure.

    What I noticed during my experience with the SSS is that common people who were enduring the wait and stupidity of these public servants would not complain even if they have been asked to come back many times within the year to follow up/file a claim for a measly sum. These people’s silence is probably the reason why inefficiencies and stupidity abound in many offices in Manila. Patience is not always a virtue and can make one a target for abuse.

    Two years ago, I accompanied our yaya, who is a diabetic and whose leg was amputated, to visit her eye doctor. We were there in the morning hoping to be seen early in the afternoon. When we got there, the waiting room was already full of people and people moved from one chair to the next just like when you line up for your visa at the American Embassy. Our yaya sat in her wheel chair for hours and was getting hungry. Late in the afternoon, we were told the doctor was not coming at all.

    How can these supposedly caregivers be so callous and let people who are sick and very vulnerable wait for hours to be seen by someone who is supposed to alleviate the pain they are suffering?

    It’s time that people complained to make it known to doctors that there is a better way of handling appointments. Allow 15 minutes per consultation. I know there are doctors who let patients go on and on, chit-chatting about their lives, sports, etc. If doctors limited their time and followed a schedule, these useless conversations could be avoided. In the end, the doctors can see more patients, earn more income and most important, patients will not waste time sitting for hours in doctors’ waiting rooms.

    How can patients be proactive regarding this? Perhaps create a blog for posting complaints regarding public servants and professionals who provide poor service? Any ideas?

  16. ECC, it seems public servants are the same everywhere on this planet. Guess what? Over at the SSS, there are employees who do not nothing but hand out application forms! Can you imagine? And the Public Assistance Center? Three people are supposed to be manning the booth but they are never there! And what is worse, the claim processors come in late, they take their coffee and lunch breaks together, leaving only one person to attend to the long queue. And this happens everyday. I know. I was there many, many useless days.

  17. AHAHAHAHHAHAHAH!!!! you made me laugh, MM!!! I had similar experiences with my doctors and doctors’ secretaries back in the Philippines. Ang nakakainis with most of our doctors in the Philippines, ni hindi mo sila pwede tawagan in case of emergency. I was bleeding to death already, ayaw pang ibigay ng secretary yung contact number ng doctor ko! Another experience pa, my surgical wound popped open (abdomen ito ha?) and di pa rin binigay ng secretary yung contact number ng surgeon ko. Grabeh! That’s what I really hate about their practice of medicine in the Philippines. Ang hirap nila maabot! Whereas in the US, ikaw pa mismo ang tatawagan ng doctor mo minsan pag nakalimutan mo mag follow-up call sa kanila. And you can call them (or their partners) anytime of the day thru their hotline, sometimes sa mismong cellphone pa nila.

    When I married my husband, I was so surprised by how they are handling their patients (he is a doctor) here in the US. They can beep my husband (or whoever is on-call for the day in their practice) anytime of the day and night, and my husband (or the doctor on-call) would return their call immediately, whether it is just about a headache or just a question of worry on the patient’s part. My husband even goes to the hospital even if it is so late in the evening as long as the OPD is still open if a patient needs to be seen immediately.

    And here, if you are a current patient of a doctor or a group of doctors, if it is on emergency basis, you will be seen immediately even if there is no prior appointment. If you have an appointment for a well-visit or not-so-emergency case and you missed your appointment, you will be refused to be seen and they will set another appointment for you. At least di ka isisingit at mag-iintay ng walang katapusan yung nagshow-up for their appointment on time.

  18. Hahahaha… That was a good laugh MM. Setting up an appointment with a doctor can really be taxing not to mention the time wasted waiting for doctors. The trick there is to befriend the secretaries so you can set appointments by phone. Working mothers like myself who neeed to regularly see their pediatricians cant afford to waste time lining up for appointments, so we really have to be chummy with the secretaries.

  19. Oh MM, the First Come First Serve system has been in place for ages. Its really frustrating. You avoid doctors like the plague, so you don’t come in contact with it. But there are some doctors who do give out their cellphone numbers and they do reply to your text inquiries. You just don’t know them yet. You have to ask your doctor for his contact number. And some secrataries will accept your call and put your name on the list, even if you’re not yet there in person. So sorry about your experience. Get well soon.

  20. MM, i am literally crying now from laughing so hard after reading this post. classic! the way that she thinks, what can i say, you will sometimes really lose your fatience hahaha!!!

    hope you peel better and have pun while taking the much needed rest

  21. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA when it rains it fours!You are making me laugh so hard my operation stitches are starting to become sore!But anyway thanks for the laugh.

  22. What a funny story! Reminds me of dealing with airline scumbags here in the US. The upside is, with this many people wishing you well, I know you will get well soon.

  23. totally out of this world MM! you deserve afflause por handling the situation well. if that woman is found dead the next day, i would wager asphyxiation as cause of death. heehee.

  24. hahahaha, that was so funny, although I hope you feel better soon. I really applaud you though for still keeping your cool. Had one experience with my dad’s doctor’s secretary, i already called for an appointment and she forgot making my dad one of the last patients to see the doctor. it would’ve been okay had not been for the fact that my dad is already 89 years old in wheelchair and diabetic. when his doctor found out, she gave the secretary a long lecture. from then on, we always get to go first. hehehe.

  25. Laughter, the BEST medicine! After reading this post, even I got cured of whatever ailment I didn’t know I had!

    And the bright woman mistook you for an embassy? Boy, you must’ve put on some serious weight! Heeheehee!!!!

  26. MarketMan, I can sooooooooooooooooooooooooo relate to you.. I deal with these kinds of people EVERYDAY!!! As in, EVERYDAY.. may it be in my sales calls, in the employees of our clients, and even officemates. I so wonder too why such people are even allowed to, the least, answer a phone call or even hold a cellphone.. tsk, tsk, tsk..

    You know it may sound funny, but imagine dealing with such people everyday, sometimes I wonder, where is the bright side???

  27. Such lameness does not only happen in trying to set an appointment with a doctor, it’s a Filipino thing.. even secretaries or staff of companies act the same, there were even instances wherein this certain company has been a good client of ours for quite a while now, and we have met the owners a few times already, but whenever I have to make a call to the bosses, the secretary would still act like as if it’s my first time to call and that they ask this military-like questions.. They reason out that they are just trying to protect their bosses, protect from what?? The bosses already know me, it’s not the first time I’m talking to him, for goodness sake, I really don’t get this kind of attitude, it’s not as if I’m going to berate their boss.. A bid DUH?!? for those lame people..

  28. i don’t get it; why is it she tot u wer imbasi so u nid to mek apuyntmint? why the ‘discrimination’? were you draped with a flag or something, in lieu of a blankie?

    anyways … i was ROTFL!!! grabe ka MM! get well soon.

  29. Thank goodness to your laughable posts! Do hope you get well soon! And, gosh, admire your commitment to post and keep us informed.

    My suggested home remedy is :) 1 tablet of 60mg of ZINC, freshly squeezed calamansi (straight-up and about 1/4-1/2 cup without any sugar or honey), 1000mg of VitaminC, and lots of rest. Drink liquids. Take this daily, until you feel revived. ZINC rebuilds your immune system.

    This one is truly up there! I can relate to some of your comments. On a brief visit to Manila from the US, I had to see an eye doctor as I had come down with a type of pink-eye (likely caught on flight). While I was able to see an opthalmologist quickly (within 48 hrs), I, too, found the process unusual. Though one already has an appt. at 9:00AM (when the docs offices open), and one is there at 8:45AM, if there’s anyone prior to you on the list and is there, they automatically are ahead of you. It is then that the doc’s staff announce that the doc actually doesn’t arrive until 10:30AM; so it’s 1hr & 45 minute wait before the doc arrives, plus another hour of waiting as he sees two patients, making it an almost 3 hr wait before you are seen. And this was at MakatiMed. How is it elsewhere??????? The cost, very affordable, but if you want a receipt, the cost doubles because of all excise taxes.

    Best wishes for a quick recovery.

  30. Its a pity that good gatekeepers are a rarity these days. Nasaan and mga breeding nila?? I remember encountering very efficient and well spoken secretaries of Doctor’s whom I visited as a child. Ngayon, ibang klase na..either they are callous, dedma,assuming and lacking in the etiquette department from answering the phone alone….pero heyyy..hhahaha.Get well soon MM and just relish the moment that your Katarayan can sometimes do wonders! Oh well with regards to dealing with cues, the only thing that keeps me occupied is simply bringing something to read. All the best MM!

  31. CC and MM, sad to say, MakatiMed is one crappy hospital. Depressing interiors, horrendous rooms, old hospital smell… Also, the secretaries and their doctors are inexplicably caught in this unprofessional, illogical pattern of behavior (stupid lists taped to the door, doctors strolling in hours late, etc.). Going there is unavoidable sometimes, so I have to suck it up.

    While other hospitals are making the effort to be world-class (ex, CSR training for their secretaries, heh), Makati Med just keeps on falling further down the pit. When I make appointments with docs at other hospitals or medical buildings, there are no stupid lists. I’m given a slot, I come on time. I do have to wait sometimes, but I know it’s because the doctor is actually IN seeing patients. For many of my family’s regular docs, I get a call or sms if the secretary knows that the doc is running late so I can adjust my sked. Guess how many of them have clinic at MakatiMed? That’s right, none.

  32. A former colleague of mine used to tell us horror stories of waiting for hours for her obgyn (at St. Luke’s, so it’s not just Makati Med that has this problem). I think it makes the smaller clinics like Healthway more attractive, since you don’t end up spending hours waiting for the doctor.

    (another former workmate of mine also had the F/P lisp (lithp?); she would contact vendors and they’d fax back quotes addressed to FAT Foundation, heehee)

  33. Did you tell her to mind her f’s and p’s MM :)

    I think this problem of perennial tardiness has to do with the fact that many of them make “lagare” between 3 or more different clinics, plus since group practices are not the norm, they have to round on their inpatients as well. Add to that the horrendous traffic! But I agree, good front desk staff make such a big difference in assuaging the family’s impatience/annoyance.

    I do see the other side of the coin, where the patient (and his mom or dad) arrives at the tail end of his appointed slot and not only expect to be seen immediately but also has a laundry list of multiple issues they want addressed that day! And sometimes they’ll want to squeeze in an extra kid (or two, or three) as well!

    I am in a group practice and one of us is always on call at the hospital and can answer patient’s questions even in the middle of the night (and I can tell you, I’ve been asked some inane questions at 4 AM just because someone’s wide awake so they think I will be too!—doesn’t happen very often, thankfully) .

    Anyway, I hope your heavy-duty antibiotics work so you won’t have to see Dr E and deal with his pront desk stap enitaym soon! :)

  34. ay hindi kayo embasi? Palengke pala kayo as in market manila. ha ha ha! that’s a good one MM. Laughter is just like a hot bowl of chicken soup, both good to your health.

  35. that had me cracking bouts of laughter MM! hahaha
    although i’m sure that it wasn’t funny at all while it was happening.
    on a serious tone, get well soon^^

  36. that was absolutely funny!!! i love flip4ever’s comment, especially when he laughed at your “exfence”. hahaha.
    laughter IS the best medicine… do get well soon.

  37. natawa ako nung may gana pa syang matawa after finding out that you are, as you claimed, a “frevious fatient”. seemed like a scene from a sitcom, heehee

  38. I am getting slower or your legions of fans are growing everyday… I can’t get my comment in the top 10!

  39. Hahaha … that’s a funny story. The exchange reminded me of an Abbott and Costello comedy routine.

    Hope you get well soon. There seems to be a really nasty virus floating around.

  40. MM,you always crack me up! This post is so hilarious!I’ll share this true story about a pinay woman who wanted a divorce from her Aussie husband.Her lawyer asked her why she was divorcing him and she says…….because he won’t give me his fay facket!! Get well soon!

  41. thanks for infecting us with such humor. I can totally relate with that. Even if I am in the medical profession. I still get to deal with secretaries like these. Sometimes they are bold enough to diagnose you already and suggest medications you can buy from her. :)

    Have a restful break and hope you get well soon.

  42. this has got to be the funniest entry ever!! i can’t wait to share this to my friend.. she has a knack for doing the barok English. hahaha! i can’t stop laughing!

  43. HEHEHEHE!! kakaloka:) i went to the doctor the other day, acute bronchitis din:( pero d tulad mo, i’m not taking any medicine, although it was recommended by the doctor, im just afraid that it might affect my baby coz im six months pregnant:) kya lots of liquids, fruits and rest lang muna ako. And i think you must do the same thing na lang and continue your medicines para gumaling kana agad at d na bumalik sa doctor at mameet again secretary nya:) bka kasi mabinat ka pa:)God Bless..

  44. hahaha!!! only in the philippines… these secretaries should undergo people skills 101 the least, they drive patients away/ crazy

  45. hahaha!!! bery punny…bery punny! I’m just so glad we’ve made some real progress with my mom’s lung specialist here in Bulacan (great doctor btw) and his very accommodating secretary…we don’t have to wait in line for hours like we used to. Our excuse? My mom is old and fragile…she doesn’t mind. We just got her out of the hospital after a bout with pneumonia two weeks ago. The doctor gave her flu and pneumonia shots last week and recommended annual shots before the start of the rainy season. A good idea especially for the elderly. Take care of yourself, MM!

  46. I thought that situations like this happens only in the provinces. Adding insult to injury, medreps easily squeeze in between patients waiting in line!

  47. This very punny fost is a very good sign that you’ll be on the quick road to recovery! You made my day! =) (And, after seeing the PDI this morning, I hope THAT made yours, too.)

  48. get well soon MM.
    have you heard about the vegetable called watercress?
    make sure it is from a clean source of water.
    i read it from mens health magazine article that it acts as a hepa filter for your lungs.
    so now i buy and cook it with sinigang or just salad/steam especially for my daughter. she has allergic asthma and ever since we started eating watercress(tunsoy)her asthma attacks have been diminishing even with sudden climate changes.

    try it.

  49. Yikes! Looks like I know the secretary and the doctor. Is his main clinic in Makati? In a street w/ the same name as the province of your beachhouse? Get well soon MM!How about some recipes for those w/ the flu? Chicken soup or sinigang can be boring at times.

  50. Hahaha! i had tears laughing at this… but i’m sure during that time you did not feel like laughing, but it is hilarious after and because it did not happen to me :D but really… if you were not seriously ill before talking to her, you will be after.. highblood! :D

  51. CWID, about your SSS story, I remember one time, in my former work, when our accountant went to an office of BIR, supposedly just to have some documents stamped and submitted, imagine it took her like 2 hours, my officemate got there at around 3pm and BIR offices close at 4pm, I think, so this brouhaha of personnel, took a loooooong coffee break, chit chatting with her colleagues, all along leaving my officemate and other people in a long line. My officemate was so annoyed (to say the least) at that personnel of BIR, she actually took pictures and videos (through her cellphone) of what that personnel was doing. When the personnel got back to her desk, and this was a few minutes before BIR office is supposed to close already, my officemate went up to her and asked that her documents be accommodated. And what could happen next? In true incompetence of this organization, the personnel told my officemate (in a scolding manner) that she could no longer do it because office hours is ABOUT to finish already. My officemate got so angry that she berated at her, showed her cellphone capturing the inefficiency of that office staff. Guess what?? The office staff actually accommodated my officemate..

    The thing is, do they still need to have the blood pressures of people raise up before they do something??

  52. I remember quite a similar annoying situation my sister had.
    The verbal exchange in the store was something like this…
    Sis: Miss, meron ba kayong shaving cream? (do you have a shaving cream?)
    Miss: Ah wala po kami nun (Ah, we don’t have that one)
    After sis scoured through the shelves, she found some cans of Gillette shaving cream.
    Sis: Miss akala ko ba wala kayong shaving cream, eh meron ah (pointing to the direction where the cans are located)
    Miss: Ah pang-ahit na cream po pala ang gusto nyo, e bat d nyo sinabi ng maaga? (Ah so what you need is a shaving cream, why didn’t you tell me in the first place)
    Duh!

  53. regarding government worker inefficiency. Two years ago I know I was really back home when at the Manila City Hall while I was paying my real estate tax. There were a group of men in barong tagalog drinking johnny walker while having a karaoke session at 10 in the morning.

  54. dangerous to ask her to look at your pile(s)…she just might do that (if she knew what it meant).

  55. Hey, MM! So sorry for the torment you went through in the hands of my comrades. :) At least you had comic relief in form of the secretary. Such idiocy is not the monopoly of doctor’s secretaries by the way, as many of your readers have already attested to.
    I myself have just come from the same hospital as an in-patient (annual check-up), and was made to wait 4 hours before getting discharged. I was simply waiting for a member of my cloth to give me my clean bill of health… how hard could that have been? I was told he would come by “after lunch”. I found out that it meant anytime after 1 pm until lunchtime the next day.
    The food was inexcusably baaaaaaaaaaaad. No surprises there, but you’d think they’d at least get sinaing right. Now I know why Pinoys like to give their hospitalized friends and loved ones gifts of food! It is charity in the truest sense!

  56. She’s gifted. she can make a dying man come alive, and would want to live to kill her. I would love to hear those f’s for p and p for f’s again. i’ve been gone too long.

  57. This is truly hilarious!!!! I had tears in my eyes and could not stop laughing. This reminded me of a joke I heard when I was still little about a former Phil. president who supposedly interchanged his ps and fs. He was asked by a reporter how he was doing after going to several countries for state visits. His reply was “All I do these days is fack and unfack”.

  58. hehehe! this is the funny side of a rather serious thing for me. =)

    i take visits to clinics/doctors/hospitals very very seriously. for one thing, we always only go pag di na kaya ng mga home remedies, needless to say, mejo malala na yung nararamdaman (bad no?). kaya pag andun na kami and we have to wait, i can’t help but think sometimes that if we had more money do i have to let my mother or husband or lola wait like this, can’t we just make an appointment at 4pm and then actually be seen at 4pm? (that is, money equating to pricier doctors who actually sees patient by appointment – or is there such a thing?)

    but again MM, thanks for writing about this, it definitely made my day!

  59. ….W texts 5 hours later: “Sino kayo, who are you, full name please.”
    ….MM says: “Why?”
    ….W texts: “Because I can just put you as #1 on the list for tomorrow’s appointments”

    Mwahahaha! LOL! My wife is an avid fan of your blog and she is right…this is hilarious! Only in da Pilipins…

  60. hi MM. this is my 2nd time to write you. my sister avidly follows your website.
    firstly, i like your sense of humor – reminds me of my brother.
    second, i have a planned trip to tacloban. my first there actually so i was wondering if you could recommend a nice resto or must-taste food /delicacies there.
    thanks, looking forward to your recommendations

  61. LOL.

    I can very well relate to your story. We are a family of doctors. My lolo’s and mom’s secretaries even had the guts to make taray to me way back then. I can just imagine how they treat other patients.

    Now that I’m a doctor too, nag-iba bigla ang ihip ng hangin. =)

    When my mom started her practice, patients were treated first come, first serve basis. But some years later, she were amongst the pioneers who switched to per appointment basis, but walk-ins our still entertained. Her patients are so thankful, because they dont have to wait too long.

    I think it will take some more years before it becomes the norm in our country. I see where most doctors are coming from. When you reserve a slot for a patient who doesnt show up, then that’s equivalent to lost time, money, and oppurtunity to help more people.

  62. this is a good read. and such reason why i choose to travel two hours from our house to see a doctor of my choice than just go to the nearest hospital from our place. “customer” service, even in the medical profession, is still important.

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